me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
