To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Randomize
