So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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