Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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