I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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