I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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