We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize
