Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
