coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
