In the future we'll all be gay
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
