found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
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