Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize