I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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