dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
