is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
