ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
