I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
