shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
