Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize