Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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