my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
