i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Randomize