I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
how does that bad decision feel?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
