i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
She told me I should be a condom model.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
