i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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