Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
