Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
