New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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