i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
