Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
