Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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