i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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