So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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