by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
