We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
