just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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