between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
