Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
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