she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
