FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
