come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Boobs are out for the taking
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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