If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize