My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
last night I used snow as a chaser
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
