Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
