Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
