she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize