a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
