Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize