pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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