So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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