he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
