Three words: puerto rican gang bang
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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